Monday, June 27, 2011

Thad and Kristina's wedding

Groomsman Matt and the flower girls in our hotel lobby

This pretty much sums up Annabelle's attitude about the whole thing.

The girls. My mother in law, me, Tara (Pauls girlfriend) and Danika (Lukes wife)

The beautiful bride and loving groom.

Sunday, June 26, 2011


I am not a big fan of excuses. I find myself making them more often than I mean to. Like right now, I am going to provide you with a list of excuses for why I have been a failure to blog. Maybe I can call them "explanations" just to keep my pride intact.

-House hunting in Jersey. I didn't take my lap top and Matt's didn't play well with blogger. Actually it crashed every time I tried to post something. So I gave up. Try and try again? Not so much.

-Wedding. Matt's baby bro got hitched and we were involved. I have pictures...and stories. I will share at a later date.

-Hand surgery. So I was thinking this was going to be no big deal. So much so that I drove myself (getting hopelessly lost in the process and showing up half an hour late) Only to be told I had to keep my hand wrapped and elevated for 4 days. Ummm yeah. Unless they were going to provide me with a nanny service that SOOOO wasn't happening. But still, I couldn't type.

-Moving and packing. The company changed the date on on us. It was madness, but now is over. All (well, almost all) my worldly possessions have been boxed, listed and loaded on a truck headed east.

-Living at dads. Currently we are crashing at Dad's. We being the girls and I, Matt is still back and forth to New Jersey. We will be in the beautiful state of CO until July 5, when we fly to Jersey where we will live cozily in a one bedroom apartment until we get the new house ready.

So there you go. Am I excused? And then there is the whole emotions thing. I just want to deal and label and correctly fix so I can move on but I can't, meaning things in my head are not neatly organized enough to write out in titled blog posts. I am in denial, I like it here, it is safe. I have yet to call Eliana's school and say she isn't coming and I am not sure if I will ever be able to re-label this blog "Crocker's of Jersey". So there you have it.

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

House hunting in Jersey

Well, I guess this makes it real. I am in Jersey, looking for a place for our family to live.

The trip out here was hell. I don't mind flying and am fairly patient when it comes to some delays and things as such, but this was ridiculous. I won't go into the whole thing but let me sum it up: plane struggled to take off from CO, layover in Ohio, plane still had mechanical issues, should have landed at 9 pm and didn't end up rolling in until almost 3 a.m. Oh, and we landed at the wrong airport.

The next day we made tracks...after very large cups of coffee and sleeping in a bit. Our idea was to rent out here, but then we saw the market. Houses that were selling in the half million range are down into the high $200's. So, we could throw away $50k or so over the next few years renting a house, or we could roll the dice and assume the market will rebound a bit and buy a house. There are sooooo many to chose from! We could even take a loss selling the house in a few years and STILL come out ahead of where we would have been if we rented. We scrambled and got pre-aproved and are now hunting.

If your interested in looking where we are looking, go to and put in Bogota, NJ. This is really close to Matt's work and a cute area close to the city too. I was going to post pictures, I brought my camera and everything, but the card reader on Matt's computer isn't working.

Here{scid=hdp-site-map-bubble-address} (forgive the obnoxious hyperlink, blogger doesn't play well with the newest version of internet explorer that Matt has on his computer) is a link to a house we looked at yesterday and LOVED! It was built in 1900, is in a super cute area of town but is currently priced WAAAAY above market value. This is also a little farther than we were hoping to be, commute time would be about 20 minutes.

So today is another day of house looking. It sorta freaks me out that we might put an offer on a house within 24 hours of deciding to BUY a house. And it is crazy that we will own 2 houses. Does this make me a grown up?

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

I hate mornings

This is like saying "Water is a bit damp-ish"

I despise mornings, loathe them, shutter at the thought. And I am not just being dramatic.

I wake up with gritty eyes. My body refuses to obey the thoughts in my head, and the thoughts are scarce. It tastes like something crawled into my mouth...and died. My hair looks as though I have been taste testing light sockets.

This morning started with a shrill and panicked cry from Annabelle, who couldn't seem to find her binky, at a little after 6 am.

I stumble out from beneath the massive pile of warm covers, trip over the dog who is obnoxiously wagging his way down the hall, excited to start his day. I find the rogue binky and try to reason with a hungry, indignant one year old that the day isn't ready to start. She wins. In all his exuberance, Otis' tail thumping the wall manages to rouse the 3 year old. She chirps a "Hi mommy, whats for breakfast?". We have yet to make in down the stairs.

My mood is black, my children hungry. My feet feel leaded. I drop the babe in her chair and chuck a banana in her general direction. I put the open box of cheerios next to Addilyn and mumble some instructions about keeping the baby happy. Off to the shower.

Hot water, warm enough to make my skin shinny pink, starts to take the edge off. I stand under the spray, hoping to feel human. I wash out my mouth, my eyes. I turn off the water, trying hard to be a responsible mother who didn't just throw a banana at the baby. Wrapped in a towel, I sit on the floor. It is a good thing the bathroom doesn't serve coffee or I wouldn't have come out. I throw on a t-shirt.

I open the door to find a child sprawled dramatically in front of it. Everything this child, my eldest, does is dramatic. Words immediately start spilling from her mouth. My brain is still processing at half speed, I try to eek out a reasonable response all the while thinking it is a God with a sick sense of humor to give a person who detests mornings in the fashion I do a child who chats incessantly from the moment her eyes open.

Morning is Matts time with the girls. This is because he would like to see our children survive to see their teen years and him being the one up with them is the best way to secure that. But Matt is gone. Most mornings Matt gets up at the first caterwaul from the babe (and sometimes a foot to the shin to wake him) and I languish in bed. Often I fall back asleep, but I am generally up before everyone has been awake for 2 hours. I like to wake up slowly, letting my body stretch, my brain un-fog.

But this isn't an option. I have hungry children who are ready to start the day. And half the battle is just showing up.