Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Crocker Updates

-Elie fell off the patio today, much drama ensued. She banged up her face pretty good, it sorta looks like we beat her, fat lip and all. Her leg is scraped up too. This is the first of many boo boos for the summer, I'm sure.

- Addie is a peach. She wakes up once a night to eat still, but is a good sleeper other than that. She is rolling both ways, can sit supported by her hands, and loves to laugh at her sister. I like this age so much more than the newborn-paperweight age.

- The stupid summer thunder storms make my dogs go nuts, it is getting a little old.

- Sony is doing some restructuring that Matt is not thrilled with. His job is not in danger or anything, but he is starting to wonder what else is out there. The travel is getting pretty old.

-I am teaching some summer school in July and am strangely excited to be back in the classroom. It will be nice to use my brain a little bit.

- We had our first harvest from the garden- radishes. Elie was NOT impressed, but she thought they were fun to pick. I had to Google Radish Recipes. There are a surprising large amount of things you can do with a radish. Who knew?

Monday, June 23, 2008


So, if your a frequent reader of my blog, you will have a general knowledge of my feelings towards church. A newbie? Let me get you caught up: I like church about as much as I like the dentist. God and I are cool, I even have grown to love and respect a few Christians in my life, but overall traditional church doesn't seem to fit me too well. I am too outspoken, too liberal, and too...disillusioned.

About a year ago, we started to go to a church called Adullam. My sis and bro in law go there and I liked the web site. It seemed organic, just a bunch of people who love Jesus who get together on Sundays. I liked that they started as small communities and then did the whole church thing instead of the other way around. It seemed like they were active and loved the community.

Now, here we are. I am back to square one. I would say it is because my expectations are unrealistic, but I am not really sure what my expectations are. Matt and I are extroverts, were happy to lend a hand and chat with those we met, but we are still on the outside of a little clique. This church feels like every other church I have been in, down to the Sunday lay out. Sure, it is casual, the pastor is less conservative, but the people are the same. People will talk to us on Sunday, smile and act like they care, but despite our questions, we have yet to find a group to belong to. I offered up some ideas of how to impact our community and never heard back from anyone. It doesn't really seem like anyone DOES anything. It is really just pretty web content and the makings of a book for our pastor.

I guess I struggle with what the point of church really is. Growth? Well, that is kind of personal, and while a good message can prompt some thought, growing is a personal choice. I like worship as a community, but do I have to be in a church to do that? I believe several people moving in the same direction can be world changing, but I can't seem to get anyone interested in moving. Church feels to me like a time when us Christians get together and nod to the content of a sermon, pat each other on the back with platitudes like "I will pray for you" and "God bless". We like big, air conditioned buildings, upbeat music, a place surrounded with people who are like us. I haven't figured out how to change the world alone, between nap times and diaper changes, but my heart longs to be a part of something bigger than myself. I am the square peg.

This is not a bash on traditional church and those who find them fulfilling. It is simply my lament that I can't seem to find a place to fit. I hate to church shop, I don't just want to be another consumer.

I have an amazing group of Christian girls in my life, we don't get together every Sunday, but could they be my "church"? If all church is is the body of Christ, believers who gather together, who love eachother and love the Lord, what am I missing?

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Pwoje Espwa

No, I didn't misspell the title, it is supposed to say that. Here is a link to one of my favorite blogs

I read this as often as I can. It is written by a priest who decided to leave the comfort of America and go to Haiti, where he felt God wanted him. When he got there, he bought a little house and started to care for orphans from the street. Soon, his new little family out grew the little house and God provided another. This went on and on until they now are on a big piece of land and care for 650 or so kids. The story is amazing, it breaks my heart every time I read it.

I am so grateful that I serve a God who is Love. Part of that means he loves me enough to want a better life for me, but not in the way that you would think. The bible, a book of God and his work in relationships through out history, is about love. His love of a nation who turned away over and over, and God who never gave up on them. A God who left the comfort of heaven to become a lowly man, so that I would better understand life changing love.

God's priority in my life is not my comfort, it is to learn to love. I write that as I sit in the air conditioned dinning room of my suburban home and the irony doesn't escape me. I worry sometimes that I am living in too much comfort, not that being provided for is a bad thing, but it doesn't seem to require much faith. It is easy to love those friends and family God brings into my life, it usually doesn't require much more than holding my tongue.

What if God wanted to take me away from all my physical comfort and send me to learn more about love in a place like Haiti? Would I go? Matt and I have talked about this so many times, this desire to leave the "easy" life, sell all our meaningless stuff and do something that matters. One day we just might do it. Until we do, what am I doing to show that I serve a God of love? I wish I had a good answer for that.

Monday, June 16, 2008


Well, we went to Disney. Matt O's lovely aunt works there and was kind enough to get us in. We It was not exactly what we expected. Matt was remembering childhood there and wanted Elie to be thrilled, I was hopping to survive the day with 2 small children and lots of crowds. Here is the thing about 2 year olds, they don't get lines and Disney is all about lines. Don't get me wrong, Elie had fun. She liked Disney like she liked trips to the zoo or "Red Birds House" aka Red Robin. To her, it was no different. To us, it was a lot more work. We enjoyed our day, it was nice to spend time with Matt's dad and step mom, to see a show and ride a few rides. With Addie, we are going to wait until she is older. I think maybe 7 or 8 is a good age for Disney. Here are my Disney tips:

1- Keep realistic expectations. You will need lots of potty breaks, drinks, and patients for crowds and long lines. Don't be afraid to find a "quite" place for a rest and snack and sit for a while.

2- What a kid likes will surprise you. Elie loved the "Billy Hill" music show, the "tea cup" ride and hugging, of all things, the penguins who hang out with Mary Poppins.

We are blessed that we got to go, so please don't think me ungraceful. Lets just say we bought into the Disney hype about "Happiest place on Earth" and Elie is just as happy playing with her friends, catching worms and Roley pollies, and buying ice cream from the ice cream truck.

Friday, June 13, 2008


We are blessed, we actually like our family and had the privilege of spending time with them in CA. Matt's cousins have kids about Elie's age, so the kids all had a blast together. We went to Disney with Matt's Dad and step-mom, hung-out with marine brother Luke, and spent some time with the girls Great Grandfather, John. Enjoy the pictures!

Tuesday, June 3, 2008


Traveling with two small children is interesting to say the least. Especially when your flight doesn't even leave Denver until 8 and your kids are used to going to bed at 7. Elie was awsome on the plane and Addie did fine too.We made it to our hotel by a little after midnight. Elie was awake the whole time, until we got into the car to come to the hotel. Both girls were up by a little after 5 am.

Yesterday we spent the day in the hotel, recovering. We shopped for lunch munchies last night so Elie and I wouldn't have to eat out mid-day. We also went and bought a swing at Babies R Us, which we will return at the end of the week. Yes, I know, thats not cool. We just didn't know what else to do.

Today we are hitting the pool. Elie loves vacation because I let her watch as many cartoons as she wants. We also brought some of our new Discovery Toys, which she loves to play with. The have the best educational toys for kids her age, its all the kind of stuff I used to use in my classroom, and Elie likes the challange.

Elie can't wait to go to Donald Ducks house (Disney). Grandpa Skip and Grandma Karen are meeting us there. Some little girls love princesses, but not Elie, she couldn't give a rip about the girls. She loves the old school cartoons, you know, the really politically incorect ones where the mice get drunk, Donald shoots guns at chip and dale, and they all beat the crap out of eachother. Don't blame me, Matt is the one who got her hooked on youtube videos.

Matt has my camera, so I will have to post some pictures later.