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It's been a minute

When thinking things through, some people talk it out with friends, some ask a professional such-and-such, some journal....

I write blog posts...mostly in my head. I have started to think it might work a bit better if they came OUT of my head.

Heaven knows that there is a LOT to work through in the world right now.

January was pretty normal, which I completely took for granted. I didn't know what I didn't know, mostly that the world was about to turn up-side down.

February we ended up in the hospital with a very sick kid. Eliana had an infection that moved into the space between her eyes and brain and cause several blood clots. There was surgery, a 10 day hospital stay, and she came home on a pharmacy worth of drugs, including a central line. I don't know what we would have done without our friends and family rallying around us. We had meals and gift cards for takeout, groceries, sleepovers for the other kids, and so many people who stood in the gap for us. My heart will forever be grateful.

March came around and Elie was ready to go back to school, still on a central line, still on drugs, but we thought we could pull it off. All the kids were thriving at school, despite the new normal at home. She went for one day before covid shut the world down.

Back in the October, the birth center I was an educator at shut its doors. I had been helping a friend out with her animal rescue and that all ended in March too.

So we figured out what it looked like to quarantine as a family. We had to be extra careful as we have several in our circle who are at high risk, including Elie. We watched movies and read stories, painted picture and crafted, did puzzles and listed to podcasts.

As of May, we were ALL sick of online school. School had gone from something everyone was enjoying to something we all hated. No one was sad to see that end!! Elies central line was pulled and we wrapped up blood thinners, she was now just a normal risk kid. But the world is still mostly shut down.

June brought protests and heartbreak and anger and so much learning. The world got ugly. People got mean.

And now July. I am exhausted. Angry politics, disregarded science, human rights ignored, people putting convenience above kindness, and everyone blaming the other. I would like a refund on this year so far, I wasn't ready.

So, with all this, I decided I might not be the only one who has a lot to process right now. So now I will blog. I don't have any deep or insightful thoughts really, mostly just trying to hang on. Wanna come too?

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