Sunday, November 6, 2011


I have a confession: I have a bad attitude. Not about everything, all the time, just lately, about a lot of things. I am grumpy that I just found out 2 of my good friends are expecting (one of them is having twins) right around the same time I am and yet here I am, stuck in Jersey, with no one to be pregnant with. I am surly about Matt leaving for Korea for 8 days. I am always cold in this stupid house, with high ceilings and absolutely no insulation and the cold winter days haven't even started yet. My kitchen is the worst and my kids eat all the time so I am always in my kitchen and always frozen, despite the many layers and slippers. None of my clothes fit me and I look like I have been hitting the Twinkies a little too hard. People in Jersey are rude and grumpy. I have to take several highways to get to my grocery store.

It is easy to forget to be thankful. I don't want to be grateful for what I have, I want to sulk and be grumpy. I want to stomp my feet and crawl back into bed. I want to flip the world the bird and put on my headphone and forget about everything and everyone. But I can't. I have 3 little girls who watch my every move and know my attitudes well, 3 little girls that I want to grow up with a little perspective. Perspective that I seem to have lost.

So here it is, my perspective, my attempt at an attitude adjustment. These are things that DON'T make me grumpy, things that I have been blessed with.

-Annabelle's singing. It is incessant. Her cheerpy little voice singing a made up tune with whatever words happen to be on her mind.

- Eliana's helpfulness. I love that she gets the baby dressed, sorts the laundry, empties the trash cans, puts away her (and everyone else) toys, she washes dishes and mirrors, sweeps the floor. All of this usually with a great attitude.

-Addilyn's willingness to laugh. About anything. Ready to tickle and wrestle, dance a silly dance and cheer up the baby.

-Matts understanding that I need grown-up conversation. Willing to talk politics, sports, education, you name it, anything but Dora and kid stuff. He is happy to pour a cup of coffee for us both and sit with me to keep my brain from rotting and oozing out my ears.

-The fall colors are beautiful out here.

Sorry, that is really all I can come up with right now. Yes, I know there is more to be grateful for: health, family, food, shelter yadda yadda yadda. But really that is all I can come up with. Guess the whole "attitude change" didn't pan out.


Kari Marie said...

Fake it 'til you make it. The heart will follow once the head paves the way. I promise. :-)

So excited to see you at Christmas. Miss and love you!

Jennifer McHam said...

Ok WHO IS PREGNANT?!?!?!?!?!? Miss you and love you friend :)

Honeycutt Family said...

I like Kari's "Fake it 'til you make it" because I've been feeling grumpy lately too. I swear it might be part of the changing of the seasons for me. Hate, hate, hate winter.
Anyway, love and miss you, friend. Wish we could go to Starbucks together and gripe, laugh, and encourage one another until this mood passed.