Friday, February 10, 2012

Fashion week

Swimming up stream. Non-conformity. Square peg, round hole and all that. I want to live differently that those I see. I want to love more, sacrifice even when it is hard, care when it isn't my business. I want to not give in to the culture of "stuff" that I am surrounded by. I want to be ok with my old car, stained furniture, imperfect wardrobe. I want to be comfortable with the choices I make for my children. If homeschooling means that they are not "socialized" and the kids I interact with are the ones who are, I guess I am ok with my sweet, socially "awkward" children. I want my children to value people above things, to care about kindness more than coolness.

An yet.

Matt arranged a partnership between Samsung PC's and a well known fashion designer. Samsung will be on the "catwalk" at fashion week in New York. He has tickets. VIP tickets backstage. To fashion week and this designers show. And I am invited.

My first thought? What will I wear? And all my ideals seem to blow away in the breeze that is pop culture. Things I don't care about, fashion, what is "hot", who the coolest people are, are now on my mind. I try to be mindful about spending my money and energy on what really matters to me, and I can say that none of these have made the list. Not that those are bad things or wrong to care about, it just isn't me. And yet I laid awake last night thinking of what I was going to wear, worrying about weather or not I would stick out like a pregnant, poorly dressed sore thumb among all these people who in all actuality I don't give a rip about and I will never see again.

And there is the rub. When all my ideals are face with the reality of the world and culture I live in, what will reign victorious? Am I confident enough in my choice to be nonconformist to live out loud when others might notice? Will I choose to be content with what I have in the midst of others reveling in excess? Will I be proud of the choices I have made in my life, to be a stay at home mom and not a professional, enough that I carry myself with pride befitting my choice? Do I actually value people more than things?

So I face my closet, my shoe rack, my stack of bags to deal with my first world problem of "what to wear". I will do the best with what I have, both body and wardrobe. I will enjoy the wearable art that I see in fashion week. I will be proud of the work my husband has done. I will see all the areas in my life where my heart desired ideals and my actually life are not in compliance.


Sarah said...

Sorry to skip over all of the moral dilemma part, but you should totally just embrace a night out with your honey and the amazingness of the runway art! P.S. I L-O-V-E Project Runway. Anyway.....

You need to check out these sites where you can rent designer (maternity) dresses for cheap (like under $50 bucks).

Jennifer McHam said...

You'll have to tell me if you see Andrej Pejic on the runway. Trust me - He has bigger issues going on than what to wear!!

I hear you girl. Sending my kids to private school... it's a daily battle. Do I keep up with the Joneses? Well, no, frankly because we CAN'T. But do I WANT to? And is this sinful? How many goats could I buy for a tiny village in Africa for the amount of the rug I desperately want??? Do I NEED that rug the way said village needs goats??? NO. But I'll bet I have this conversation with myself at least once a day. Best of luck. Can't wait to hear all about the rich and famous ;) xoxo.

Kari Marie said...

Definitely a dilemma of sorts and I understand where you're coming from. Even in my little denver world, I face those battles of fashion and single girls...Frye boots, Michael Koors watches, and facials...and I so want! And yet, I don't like the pressure of keeping up with those things.

But enjoy the night out and have fun with hubby...and just remember: it's only a show, not 'real life'.

Denise said...

Only a show...not real life, well said, Kari; those people are not real life, real life is in Jesus and serving Him and others around you. "Do not lay up for yourselves treasure upon earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal. But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven where neither moth nor rust destroys, and where thieves do not break in or steal; for where your treasure is, there will your heart be also." I'd say your treasure, Gretchen, is right where it belongs. Love you!! and I hope you had fun.

curlyjo said...

What my favorite Dansko clogs are neither hip or trendy? And I thought doing my hair and make up on the same day was haute couture...well damn....feelin' it with you sister!

curlyjo said...

What my favorite Dansko clogs are neither hip or trendy? And I thought doing my hair and make up on the same day was haute couture...well damn....feelin' it with you sister!