Skip to main content

Not my fault

The other night we had company for dinner. I had 3 dessert choices, which Matt said was excessive. Whatever. It isn't my fault that he doesn't like cherries and so I had to make flourless chocolate cake with almonds and ganache for him. The baby wanted black forest brownies and I just happened to have blueberry cheesecake on hand from the day or two before. Anyway, our guest was expecting too, and twins at that!

It isn't my fault I burned my tongue on the hot-out-of-the oven pina colada cake. It smelled soooo good and the baby said he needed a bite RIGHT NOW. And who am I to say no to a little guy who is just trying his best to grow and get fat? What kind of mother would I be?

I spend a majority of time in yoga pants, which I should not be blamed for. After all, if the makers of maternity clothing understood how hard it is to keep pants on a round belly, maybe they would be a little more innovative. And my pants always feel tight...maybe it is the dessert options at my house.

It really isn't my fault that your feet stick to my floors. You see, it is getting really hard to mop them. And mopping takes time and I am currently spending every moment sans children (read: nap time) sleeping. Or finding things to eat. Just keep your shoes on and you will be fine.

All the half completed project around my house? Well I keep waiting for this nesting thing to kick in but seem to loose motivation about half way through. And Matt keeps going to work instead of following me around and finishing what I start like he does on the weekends. So really, I blame Samsung.

Eating jello salad straight from the pan? The baby made me do it. Sleeping in until 9? The baby's fault. Convincing Eliana it is her job to take her baby sister potty? Totally her brothers fault, I just can't hustle to the bathroom like her fast little 6 year old legs can. Hours spent pinning random crap on Pinterest? Well, for that I blame my friends. If they didn't have good taste I wouldn't feel the need to see what they pinned. So you see, it isn't really my fault.


Comments

Denise said…
You are being so politically correct in this blog post...it IS everyone else's fault.
24 March, 2012 16:54
Denise said…
btw, for anyone who doesn't know me....I am being sarcastic.
24 March, 2012 18:39
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Working on my Domestic Goddess Badge

I looked at the to-do list I made last week and am happy to say I can cross off almost everything on it. It only took me 2 weeks. I think I either need smaller lists or more time. Here is what I have been up to: -I have made 2 loaves of banana oat bread, 1 batch of blackberry strawberry freezer jam, 1 loaf of gluten free bread. -From 12 juiced grapefruit I made grapefruit curd and a pan of grapefruit bars. -My garden is almost completely done, including a upgrade in size. I am growing tomatoes, onions, peppers, potatoes , cabbage, broccoli, cauliflower , herbs, lettuce, spinach , green beans, snap peas, cucumbers, and kohlrabi. -I hung herbs to dry -I have folded massive amounts of laundry...with more yet to do. All washed with my homemade laundry soap. -I recovered the "green monster" which is another post entirely. -I added a sitting area in my bedroom, where I am currently sitting, so that my laptop has a home other than the kitchen table. - I got a new dining room table a...
23 comments
Read more

Blogging

So I have lost the love of blogging. I have always believed it is a narcissistic pass time, yet enjoy it anyway. I have found I easily spend entirely too much time tied to my computer. By the time I check Facebook , e-mail, friends blogs, etc I can easily waste an hour, if not two, of time. A friend of mine just blogged about the same thing. Yes, I get the irony of a blog post about not blog posting, but alas, here it is: I just read a good friends blog about my blog. A great leader here in Boulder, Kevin Colon wrote this: “Hugh moved to Denver to do a training deal for an organization and he ended up starting a church. His blogging is not incredibly frequent but when he does blog….it’s good!” Now, while I’m humbled that a man like Kevin would even want to read my blog, I figured it was a good time to state once and for all why I only post once or twice a month. Simply this……..”I prefer to spend my time with people.” I’ ve always wondered how people have time to read blogs, let alo...
15 comments
Read more

Birth Story of Jamison Drake Crocker

Not everyone likes to hear how a baby made his way into the world. If you are one of those who just wants to know that baby has arrived and everyone is doing great, then read no further than this paragraph. Jamison Drake Crocker was born at 10:45 on Friday morning, May 18th. He is a big, healthy boy weighing 9lbs and 2oz and is 21.5 inches long. Mama and baby are doing great, sisters are in love and papa is proud. If you are still reading, consider yourself warned. Birth can be messy, and while I have every intention of keeping this non-stomach churning, not all stomachs are made of the same stuff. On Thursday night, Matt had to be in the city for a press event. Around 10:00 I texted and asked him for an ETA and he said he would be home around midnight. I took my very round self and went to bed. I slept fitfully, big and uncomfortable and being woken up by contractions every so often kept me from falling into a deep sleep. At 3:00 am I got up only to find Matt wasn't home. I ...
9 comments
Read more