Monday, August 9, 2010

Square Pegs

I have a bunch of things that I should be posting about, things that most people would probably find more interesting than what I am going to write about. Cute things, like Eliana and the ice cream man, things like my weekend away with my sister, helpful things like the recipe for the yummy ice cream sandwiches. But, this is my blog, darn it, and I will write about what is on my mind. MOPS.

I have never been a good fit for MOPS. Maybe that isn't entirely true, there might be a MOPS group out there that IS a good fit for someone like me, it just so happens I am not a part of that group. I am part of the fundamentalist christian group who has a great love for traditionalism. While I love many of the women at my MOPS, they are some of my closest friend and I am grateful for them, overall MOPS is just a bad fit for me, let me share a story to illustrate my point.

Every summer MOPS goes on break, this summer not being any different. They needed someone to plan summer events to keep us all connected and must have been desperate because they asked me. I have made it clear in the past that I am NOT leadership material. If I was to serve on leadership then I would have to be in agreement with the direction to lead, which I am not.

Any way, I planned a bunch of summer events and included a book club as we have a fair amount of women in our group who are big readers. I chose 3 books, The Time Travelers Wife, The Red Tent and Girl Meets God. I was intentional in not choosing christian books as MOPS is supposed to be available to all women and not just traditional evangelical Christians. After all, what non-Christian would want to join a book club with all sub-par christian literature telling them everything they believe is wrong and they are going to hell? By the way, that is my rub with the church in general, this need to shove Jesus down peoples throat, and not just MOPS.

I received a call about a week before the first book club meeting. The book choices were not acceptable. This couldn't be a MOPS book club. I went ahead and sent out an e-mail letting everyone know. The e-mail was polite, if slightly barbed. I don't mind that MOPS didn't approve of my book choices, they don't probable approve of a vast majority of my life, so that is not why MOPS is on my mind.

The new MOPS year is set to begin soon and I am questioning weather I should re-up. I do love my girlfriends there, but often don't get to chat with them at MOPS because we are so busying doing "circle time" and "craft time" and "forced conversation time". Then there is the problem of Annabelles morning nap and the girls teachers as MOPS.

Sometimes I could just be happy being a nice, round peg like everyone else seems to be. The "ideal Christian woman" who happily agrees with everything that is being taught, sitting quietly and nodding her head when hearing about that damn Proverbs 31 woman. A woman who believes converting someone just means getting them through the front door of a church. A woman who sings along to christian radio on the way to church and happily reads Jannette Oke. Woman who follow there husbands around like puppies, thinking they are God's gift of leadership. Jumper wearing, bible toting, praise song singing, Church attending women.

Ugh, my square peg corners are getting chafed just posting this. I have nothing against women like the above, I am just not one of them. Where is the club for women like me? Those who are disgusted with what the church has become? Those who want to get to know other women's children instead of just shoving them in a nursery as soon as we walk in? The kind of women who want to get out and serve, to make a difference, to understand the the world is bigger than my suburban neighborhood? Women who understand that marriage is hard and sometimes sucks, that parenting is more than just learning not to yell at your kids? I need a place for other square pegs...assuming I am not the only one.

3 comments:

NLWilliams said...

gretchen -- love your insights.
love that you're sharing them.
a blog is the place to do that!

Denise said...

Be encouraged, my dear daughter, the times they are a changin' and all around me is proof. We'll need to get together and talk soon. And speaking of The Red Tent (haven't read that) I read "Day After Night"...it was very good and now I'm reading "Good Harbor". I must like it cuz I'm almost halfway done and I only got it yesterday.

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